I absolutely love the community that is developing around The Question Journey. What I love about it is that I’ve decided to share my truth with you. Who I am, without positioning my life or experiences for optimum “effect”. I tell it like it is. Because one of the most powerful things I’ve learned in my journey is that when someone shares their truth it resonates with me- I feel that truth within me. Today’s blog is proof positive that that goes both ways. That when I share my truth with others, it resonates with them as well.

The following was sent to me by Marvin Double, who has been following my blog, Newsletters and Tweets. Marvin often sends me intriguing feedback, but this one touched something inside of me as I am sure it will for many. In order for this to really make sense, I’m including the original newsletter article I wrote:

February 18 Newsletter: Are You Open to Receiving?

When someone gives you a gift for no apparent reason – what is your initial reaction? Disbelief? Wonder? Amazement? Joy? Guilt?

Too often we do not even notice our initial reaction and within a nanosecond we use our habitual reaction – whatever that might be…”Oh no, I can’t accept that”, “What did I do to deserve this?”, “What for?”, “Why are you giving me this?” and of course, for those who actually do know how to receive, “Thank You”.

The more perceived value the gift has, the more difficulty we have in our ability to receive it unconditionally. And therein lies the crux – that word, “unconditional”.

How often have we been bribed, tied to another or otherwise emotionally blackmailed through the use of gifts? Or perhaps you never received them and have no point of reference on which to base your reaction other than it feels “uncomfortable”.

Regardless of how gifts are being offered to you, whether they carry an expectation on the part of the giver or not, if you receive them unconditionally, then that it is what it is – a gift, to you, for no other reason than that you are a child of the Universe and deserving of such. Enjoy it, allow yourself to experience the joy of feeling spoiled, treasure it and yeah, maybe even throw in a Universal Happy Dance! Tell the Universe you want more of it – because YOU deserve it! ~Trish

Marvin Double’s Response:

I just finished reading your newsletter for February 18, Are You Open To Receiving? This struck a cord with me so I felt compelled to make a comment.

I’m a baby boomer, born in 1950.  My parents, while not overtly religious were Baptists and clearly subscribed to the basic tenets of
Christianity.  In our home the principals embodied in the so called Golden Rule were very much in evidence.  Honesty and integrity were sacrosanct as was the more general concept of strength of character.

One of the more pervasive ideas, which is interwoven into this moral tapestry is the idea of self sacrifice.  The idea of thinking of others first or putting others before oneself was so much a part of my family culture that it became imprinted into ones subconscious.  This idea of giving to others was very much reinforced by a larger societal paradigm.

The concept of self sacrifice or putting others first was evident in such simple acts as, never taking the largest piece of cake, allowing
others to go through a door first and demonstrating ones moral certainty by being modest, retiring and self effacing.

All this comes to focus in the basic Christian theology that we are in fact imperfect having inherited so called “original sin”.  The subconscious message within that idea is, we are undeserving and ungrateful beings as a part of our basic nature. We can only fully
benefit from God’s love if we admit this and accept salvation. In the Baptist tradition this acknowledgment is made publicly through the ritual of baptism.

For some this social and religious foundation, illustrated by parents, teachers and civil leaders, can and often does create a high degree of uncertainty as to ones personal worth.  After all, the very idea that even God won’t love us if we don’t first admit we are flawed is a pretty powerful message.

When we are also told that self-sacrifice and putting others first is a way of gaining favor with others and God, the die is cast for many of us to go through life feeling undeserving.  One need not look beyond the example that, as we are told, Jesus died for our sins, to see how the idea of self-sacrifice is used to influence our thinking and behavior.

How many of us go to the grave thinking that we haven’t done enough for others to curry the favor of a righteous demanding and judgmental God?  How many of us live in the long shadow cast by a deep need for parental approval?

Little wonder then, that so many of us have trouble accepting the idea that happiness and abundance are in fact the natural order of things.  That accepting love as it manifests in different ways is not only OK but also part of the divine intention.

Many of us were raised in a culture of scarcity and fear. We are taught that we have no value aside from that which others bestow upon us; that we must know our place, mind our manners and never expect too much from life. It is ours then to strive and suffer and die in hope that we we be acknowledged for our humility and sacrifice.

Shifting from such thoughts into a mindset of universal love, a love which requires no such sacrifice, which need not be earned is not always easy.  You’re message is one which needs to be heard and taken directly to heart.  Thanks very much for putting it out there for all to see.

Namaste
Marvin Double

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Enjoying the Journey! ~Trish